(a comedic story that takes place after the events of Aspects - featuring Johanna and Misery (who is still trapped in the body of an insect) )
Johanna was drying her hair after getting out of the shower. She plugged in her hair dryer and turns it on. She was dressed in a floral robe and a pair of slippers. As she plugged in her hairdryer the lights went out. "What the hell? I don't have that much on...."
She sighed as she stepped up from her bed and went downstairs in the basement. "Oh great where's the fusebox?"she muttered to herself, using a flashlight to look around.
Meanwhile down in the basement a strange red "bug" crawled through a space in the wall and observed her new surroundings from glowing yellow eyes - <<this is humiliating.. three days.. yet this curse remains.. how long must I endure this? the effects should ware off in a few months.. no matter.. I can not allow this to slow me down.. I must continue my work..>> she thought to herself.
Johanna then thought, 'Huh, I have the sudden feeling that I'm being watched by an incredibly evil and nigh-omnipotent entitiy that wants to torment me...probably nothing."
The "bug" stretched her limbs a little then scuttled across the basement floor, moving rather fast despite her relatively small size <<..even in this prison I am eternal and if Creation thinks this will tame Misery she is greatly mistaken.. I shall return to my former power soon enough and when I do I shall make them pay for this..>>.
Johanna then accidently dropped her flashlight. "Oh damn it." she muttered. She kneeled down and found that the batteries flew out when she dropped it, "Oh for god's sake!"
Misery makes her way over to Johanna and thinks a little <<..well.. I may as well begin.. let us see how well this prison can hold a being such as myself..>> - with that she sits patiently as she observes Johanna, as if waiting for something. Johanna found the battery, sighing, "There you are."
She turned around and saw a large red beetle. "Ew, giant bug," she muttered to herself, picking up a book from a near-by stack and attempt to drop it on the bug.
Misery scuttles away quickly and hid in a corner, frowning slightly as the book landed on the ground where she once was <<..curse this form.. patience Misery.. you must have patience..>>.
Johanna replaced the fuse, and smiled as the lights turned on. As she went upstairs, the phone rang. She answered, "Hello? Oh! Hey Todd. You're calling from where? Look, we might get covered for long distances but I doubt interdimetional calls count...," Johanna was completely distracted by the phone call.
Misery scuttles forward once more and heads towards Johanna, stopping a few feet away as she thinks <<..alright.. no more games..>> - with that the phone suddenly begins to distort, crackling and hissing sounds making it difficult to keep conversation: eventually the distortion ends and a dark voice speaks from the other end of the phone to Johanna.
"..do you believe in monsters? ..of course you do, being with the World Walker and all.. if I were you I would watch your step.. there are things between Heaven and Earth you could never even dream of in your darkest nightmares..".
Johanna leaped a mile in her skin. "Who is this?" she demanded.
Misery moved forward a little, seeming to enjoy this - normally this kind of petty behavior was for her "brother" Phobia but she didn't let it bother her as she continued to manipulate the phone:
"..oh, nobody.. just remember what I said.." - with that the phone cut off completely.
Johanna picked up the phone and whispered, "Hello?" She sighed when Todd replied. "Must be some interdimensional interference." She turned and saw Misery in bug form. "Wait one moment, got s roach or beetle or something to kill." Johanna put the phone on hold grabbed the bug swatter and swiftly sent it downwards towards Misery.
Misery scuttled across the room at this, <<..ack.. accursed girl..>> she thinks to herself as she once again narrowly avoided being struck.. then turned back around and charged straight at Johanna.
Johanna groaned out of irritation and swatted again muttering, "I don't have time for this, I need to get dressed."
Misery is knocked over by the swat and spins over to a corner of the room, shaking herself as she growls a little and looks to Johanna as she rubs her head a little in a somewhat cartoonish manner <<..ugh.. this is ridiculous..>>.
"Damn bug," Johanna groaned, going upstairs to changed.
Misery isn't deterred however and concentrates, as she does so the stairs begin to stretch impossibly as Misery slows Johanna down with an illusion - scuttling right back towards her as she speaks directly to her: "Enough of this! I will not be made a fool of by a simple-minded mortal girl! turn and face me!".
Of course to Johanna this appears as a voice speaking from pretty much nowhere, unless she is particularly observent.
Johanna looked around and didn't find the source of the voice. 'Must be a demon,' she thought, panicking slightly.
She kneeled down and took two poles out from under the railing and hold them together like a cross.
Misery stays in place as she continues: "..your silly toys won't protect you - this is not a game and I grow tired of waiting.. you will learn now the terror of a thousand - hey.. wait a minute.. stop! I demand you to stop!".
Misery suddenly begins scuttling around, to avoid Johanna as she begins moving around.
"Where are you?" Johanna snapped, really wishing Todd was there...or at least have a vial of holy water, despite what the voice said.
"I am right here you stupid little -! ugh! just stay still! stay still!" Misery snaps, unusually flustered as she runs around in circles, trying to avoid Johanna and beginning to wish she had at least been imprisoned in the body capable of flight rather than a crawling vermin.
Johanna looked down and finally noticed the Devil's coach horse beetle that talks. "Holy crap!...you talk?"
"Amazing! she has a brain! of course I talk, you miserable little wretch - do you have any idea who I am? I am the terror of a thousand worlds, the destroyer or hope.." Misery replies, though this all sounds rather amusing coming from something that while fierce-looking is still pretty small.
Johanna laughed, ""Destroyer of hope?" That's funny. That's funny. I mean, you're ugly, granted, but you're still just a bug."
"I am not a bug! I am -" Misery began, then stopped herself, there was no way she was going to reveal her true self to the mortal world like this - it was embarassing enough that the Absolutes knew.. " - an alien overlord of the tenth dimension.. yeah.. uh.." - Misery silently cursed herself for such a stupid title, yet she was still rather flustered thus not exactly thinking straight.
Johanna replied, "That's not ppossible...Todd overthrew him a month ago after he became a "god"."
"He lied to you.. that's what men do.. they lie.." Misery notes, taking advantage of the situation "..even if he didn't you do know that every alien monstrosity must have at least one older sibling, offspring or other relation who is ready to avenge their defeat? ..I mean really..".
Johanna rolled her eyes and replied, "Alright granted, both those things are true, but Todd wouldn't. He's been my friend since...er, for a while."
"Really? care to bet on that?" Misery begins.
Johanna raised an eyebrow, "A deal...with a bug?"
"I don't think a deal is necessary.. I'm simply willing to bet your "friend" is not what you think.." Misery begins, the phone ringing before she can finish.
Johanna grabbed the phone. It was Todd again. "Uh...s-sure, I-I'd love to!" Todd just asked Johanna to go to a movie when he returned home.
Suddenly Todd is cut off as a voice not unlike his own suddenly says "too bad - I'm busy" - the phone then cuts off abruptly. "What the hell?" asked Johanna. "Hello?" The line was dead.
Misery took the time to scurry next to Johanna and asked from behind, "well? what do you think of your friend now?"
Johanna looked at the bug and snapped, "Sort of suspisious don't you think...invites me to movie, only to snap saying he's too busy? After you said he might not be my friend?"
"Oh? so now you develop a spine? what exactly are you going to do? you are all alone - no one to help you.. oh! I know.. you'll phone your little friend.. "help! help! there's an alien bug in my basement! save me!".." Misery replies, doing a little "dance" in a circle as if mimicking a panicked response. Johanna tried to crush the bug with the pole from the stairwell out of frustration.
Misery jumped out of the way of the pole and continued "..oh dear, oh my.. what am I to do? the nasty bug's being mean to me! save me Todd! save me!" - with that the "bug" turns and starts scurrying across the room.
Johanna huffed, "I don't have time for this you mutant freak." She kneeled and exhaled, trying to blow the bug off the step.
Misery tumbles off the step and dusts herself off before disappearing in a puff of smoke, reappearing on a step just above Johanna.
Johanna rolled her eyes and groaned, "Just go eat sugar water or something, I have to get dressed."
Misery responds by leaping straight at Johanna with surprising speed for something so small.
Johanna instinctively tried to backhand the bug away, muttering in an irritated voice.
Misery lands on her back due to the backhand and wriggles around, unable to right her "..stupid girl! ..you are nothing! nothing!".
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you need me, I'll be getting dressed. Don't need me." Johanna said, atempting to go up the endless stairs again.
Misery flips herself over after a few moments, then hops up the stairs - following Johanna: bravely scuttling right past her as the bug stops at the very top of the stairs and holds her front limbs out as she tries to block Johanna's path and prevent her exiting.
She rolled her eyes and stepped over Misery.
Misery frowns as she watches Johanna exit, then her eyes catch something at the edge of the basement floor - she chuckles slightly and allows Johanna to head out as she scuttles over to the object "..alright.. one last chance.. this will work.. for sure.." she thinks to herself.
Johanna went upstairs and got dressed. "Alright, let's see what that bug's going to do now...best to get rid of it now before Todd gets back." she sighed. She left her room and started looking for the bug.
However when Johanna leaves her room she finds a very unusual sight indeed, a remote-control car with a familiar bug riding it, the car's remote taped to its top as the bug rides the toy straight towards Johanna - how it found batteries is anyone's guess but it doesn't seem to end there as Misery has also taped a small radio to the remote-control car, which blares out Ride of the Valkyries.
"What the hell?" Johanna asked herself. As the car approched her got ready to kick it back down the stairs.
Misery swerves the car at the kick, narrowly avoiding it, spinning the car in a circle around Johanna as the radio continues blaring - the "bug" firing a line of string from behind the car: having obviously modified the toys quite significantly.
"Oh damn it." Johanna groaned, kneeling and trying to picking up the car.
Misery continues to drive the car in circles until the string forms a loose circle around Johanna's feet - then moves it forward at great speed, causing the string the wrap around Johanna's legs: due to kneeling down Johanna is at risk of tumbling over as a result, though she may be able to hold her arms out to avoid damage.
She holds her arms out to avoid injuries and mutttered, "Oh for God's sake!"
Misery then steers the car and faces Johanna - making revving sounds as she drives straight aat Johanna, however should Johanna dive to one side the car will easily miss her.
Johanna extended her arm, in hopes of grabbing the car. 'Besides, how much could this possibly hurt? It's just a toy.'
Misery flips a small switch on the car as Johanna reaches out to grab it, causing the toy to spark with electricity - not nearly enough to cause serious harm: just enough to give a shock, Misery herself rolls a small distance on the floor as she jumps out of the car.
Johanna recovered from the shock and tore the string off. "Look, why are you here? I didn't do anything to you...and if you are to be believed neither did Todd...ok, granted, he killed your brother. But your brother literally dropped a house on himself...strange way for a god to die though..."
Misery simply reacts by leaping onto a nearby table, which just happens to have a bowl filled with candy - which she instantly starts hurling at Johanna: the candy flying forward like little projectiles:
"You really want to know?" she asks.
Johanna, not minding the candy hitting her, even catching and poping a malt ball into her mouth, nonchalentently answered, "I guess."
Misery's eyes glow yellow and the malt ball takes on the flavor of vinegar - the bug hopping off the table and scuttling right over to Johanna "because I am bad and there is nothing you can do about it, you will be tormented for the rest of your life and there is nothing you can do!".
Johanna spat out the malt ball into a garbage bin, grabbed the candy bowl, turned it over and tried to imprison Misery.
Misery reacts by scuttling across the room, the candy bowl indeed trapping her - yet despite Johanna's efforts the bug somehow has the strength to move around: the bowl now acting like a little armord shell: "..face it.. you are doomed.. however.. I will leave you alone: on one condition..".
Johanna forced her hand down on the bowl, keeping it still and asked, "What?"
Misery taps on the bowl "..you let me out of this bowl..".
"How do I know you're telling the truth?"
Misery replies quite simply "..put it this way.. you can't keep me here forever.. you have no real choice..".
Johanna nodded and lifted the bowl a few centimeters above Misery, just enough for her to squeeze out.
Misery responds by darting out rapidly and charging at Johanna, laughing somewhat "fool! you fell into my.. trap?" - she pauses as she bumps against Johanna: realizing how much bigger she was and silently curses her inability to change form.
Johanna swiftly attempted to recapture Misery with the bowl.
Misery darts away, running across the floor and evading the bowl as she looks for a hiding spot nearby.
Johanna groaned. "Well I'm leaving, I'm going to meet Todd er...elsewhere." Johanna said, walking out the door, accidently leaving the door open a little.
Misery had enough of this as she notices Johanna once again dismissing her and scuttles with amazing speed, stopping in front of Johanna and holding her front limbs up as if trying to halt her progress - too flustered to realize that standing in her way at this point wasn't the wisest of choices.
Johanna rolled her eyes and decided to do what she should have done the whole time, crush the bug. Johanna attempted to crush Misery under her sneaker.
Unfortunately for Misery her form, while tiny, is still rather indestructible - thus instead of being outright crushed she sticks to the underside of sneaker almost like a cartoon: dazed and more than a little annoyed at the whole situation. "..ugh..no.. curse this stupid form..".
Johanna continue walking, completely unaware that Misery was still stuck on her shoe. "Hmm...I should get my paycheck, so I can help Todd pay for the movie." There was a short cut across a very gravaly road.
Misery growls somewhat but is soon spirited away, while Johanna wanders off - much to Misery's surprise she is soon spiralling between worlds as a robed figure speaks to her "..you can thank me later, mother - let's get out of here.."
"Yes.. oh? one more thing.."
"Inform any of the others on what occured and I shall break you in two.."
"Of course mother"
"I'll get you next time Johanna, next time!"
A man suddenly appeared before the two, dressed in a suit, cloak, with shining ember eyes. "The bug Rot," demaned the man, "Hand it over."
Rot looks to the man and simply states "..do not think yourself remoted qualified to tell an Absolute what to do, little man..".
"Rot, do as he says.."
"What? Mother - I.." Rot began.
"Don't question me!"
Rot frowns somewhat, at least as much as a skeleton can frown - reluctantly handing over the "bug", however she does not touch the man directly - if she had his arm would of likely withered off like a dead tree branch, as much as the thought amused her she knew better than to risk it with her mother around.
Nilrem looked down and asked, "You talk? Still don't get why Ba'al wants you. Maybe you can shed some light on this...little beetle."
The bug simply notes "you should not concern yourself as to your master's will - perhaps he is a collector of rare insects.. perhaps he sees something in me you do not.. or maybe he is simply mad.. eiyher way: you would not be wise to cross him.." - she then asides to Rot "..go home, Rot - you can not follow us..".
Rot frowns a little, not trusting Nilrem and feeling a little used by Misery (which she often is) - however she sulks away into the shadows without another word.
Nilrem snarled, "Don't mock my master! He was fashioned by the fires of Infernum by the Source of All Destruction himself! And yet you call him a bug collector. Believe me, my master might see something I don't but he crushes humans, just as easily I can crush you. Got it?"
Misery laughs, a dark and ancient laugh - "..it's not me you need to concern yourself with, Nilrem.." - with that a large shadowy figure appears, having seemingly appeared from nowhere: the appearance says it all, cloven hooves, goat-like horns and a large trident.. yet feminine in nature..
<<There will be no need for that Nilrem, your master wishes to speak with us.. now take us there and spare us the dramatics..>> Nilrem recognized the female devil instantly, "Evil? Of course. Off to Hell-Beta then."
And just like that, the trio appeared in the hell dimension, confronted by a large ember orb, within it was Ba'al, a giant grub body, a human face, a long scorpion tail with a fail tip, lion limbs and a rack of horns. "Nilrem, you have returned with the bug...and Evil has joined you."
Nilrem bowed before his master holding the bug in front of the orb. "Good. Now be gone! I must speak with Evil and Mis...the bug alone."
Nilrem bowed again, "As you wish." "And try to kill the meddling World Walker!"
Evil simply watches as Nilrem leaves, then turns to Ba'al - picking Misery up as the larger demon's eyes glow yellow - her voice dark as she notes "..Ba'al.. as handsome as ever.. what brings us to these turns of events? it is not often Hell-Lords seek the company of others..".
Ba'al replied, "You're looking good youself Evil. But I summoned you here for your assistence. I need you to help Nilrem free me from this prison of God! I think you know how that happened Evil..."
Evil thinks on this, then strokes the bug-like Misery as her eyes glow brighter "..Ba'al.. you have made a wise choice coming to me - you'll see.. I am the greatest ally you could ever want.. now, let us discuss business: shall we?".
- THE END? -