a light-hearted story inspired by a topic in chat about SIM taking on an internet troll - enjoy!
Rise of The Techno-Freak
The scene opens to a scene of carnage as a towering figure dressed in spiked armor lays atop a mountain of defeated foes, flexing his muscles and laughing maniacally as thunder crashed across the red skies.
"None can stand against the awesome might of the Techno-Freak! cower before me puny mortals! a-haha-a!"
Suddenly the scene becomes akin to static as a female voice breaks the atmosphere..
"Francis! dinner time!".
Instantly the scene shifts to an apartment block and a skinny teen with spiky red hair and taped-up glasses as well as a rather severe case of acne - he frowned in anger as he removed his V-Monitor and yelled out:
"..oh mom! I was playing World of Ownage - I was Level 5000!"
"your little friends can wait, Francis! now hurry! we're having your favorite! macaroni - I even made a smiley face, just the way to like it!"
"you are standing in the way of my conquest of the V-Net!"
"that's nice Francis.. now come on.. dinner's getting cold.."
The scene shifts once more to a decidely alien landscape resembling a floating sea of binary code - floating amidst this ocean of data was a humanoid mouse dressed in a simple outfit that hugged her form and kept her decent.
The figure flicked her tail a little as she formed a large chair out of seemingly nowhere, leaning down into it as she formed a holographic screen next to her - floating impossibly in midair as she begin typing away at its surface, monitoring the coming and goings of the hive of activity that was the V-Net.
After a few minutes another figure appeared nearby, a portal opening from a nearby Server - the figure looked badly beaten and was dressed in a suit of medieval armor: he held a small piece of paper in his hand as he called out: "..help.. us.. please..".
the figure instantly ran over, the alien environment meaning nothing to her, crouching down over the injured figure she flattened her ears in concern and slowly removed the piece of paper from his hands: "..who did this to you?" she asks.
"..Techno-Freak.. the slayer of newbies.. the ender of hope.. we need SIM.." the injured man replies.
SIM suddenly blinked, one of her ears perking up as she reads the piece of paper "..wait a minute.. World of Ownage? you mean.. you're from a video-game? I thought you were hurt!".
"..hurt!? hurt!? look at me! I am but level 20.. I may as well be dead of shame! oh the travesty! how can a newbie such as I stand a chance of glory with Techno-Freak's tyranny? I can not live under the torment of eternal lulz.." the injured man replies.
"...you're insane.. this is insane.." SIM begins, rising to her feet and turning as if to walk away.
"please reconsider your actions, dear SIM.." a voice speaks, causing SIM to jump slightly as she looks to the piece of paper in her hand - noticing a face appearing on it.
"..what -?" SIM begins.
"I am Lord Haxxorz, Level 4999 Overlord of World of Ownage.. you must realize.. this Techno-Freak.. he is a menace to all the V-Net.. his words cut deeper than any sword.. he has ascended to the 5000th level.. I can no longer contain him.. I beg you, great SIM.. help a troubled people against the clutches of a madman.." the face pleas.
SIM frowns for a moment, her ears folding back - after a few minutes of thought she sighs "..oh alright! I'll help you guys out.. this one time.. and only because you're so pathetic.."
"thank you, kind SIM! you shall be hailed forever as a hero of Ownage!" Lord Haxxorz decrees "..allow me to open a portal to my world..".
"..no need.." SIM says, extending a hand and opening a portal herself "..just get your people to safety, I'm taking out the trash..".
Upon stepping out of the portal SIM finds herself transported to a new world resembling a grassy field complete with several trees - she raises an eyebrow as she watches a group of armored figures running around in circles.
"..argh! use the Tornado Attack!"
"I can't! he's hacked my Spell Bar!"
"I've been nerfed guys! do something!"
"I need FURY!"
SIM then blinks as the group are blown into the sky by a massive bolt of fire, the group proceeding to rain down again - their armor blackened by the blast as they crawl away.
SIM narrows her eyes as her gaze leads her to the cause of the fireball, a massive figure dressed in spiked armor - laughing maniacally as several peasants bow down at his feet repeatedly.
"we are not worthy! we are not worthy!" the peasants chant.
"That's right! cower! cower before your new master! a-haha-a!" the towering figure yells out.
"..you have got to be kidding me.." SIM thought to herself as she walked over to the figure, preparing herself for the inevitable.
As SIM approaches the towering figure makes a dramatic motion, the peasants scatter in every direction:
"Halt, tiny mouse thing! none may pass without facing the might of Techno-Freak! prepare to be served!" the towering figure declares, hurling a bolt of fire at SIM.
SIM reacts by waving her hand, forming a shield that simply absorbed the fireball on impact - coming to a stop by Techno-Freak she looks up at his form then comments: "..you are violating several of this Server's laws and harassing newer members of the community, your tactics are also unfair and degrading.. in short, Techno-Freak.. you are a braggart and a bully.. now are you going to play nice or do I have to force you to leave this Server?".
Techno-Freak looks shocked at the fact his attack didn't damage SIM, yet when she gives him a verbal beatdown he quickly begins to act up again - laughing maniacally as he towers over her:
"this Server belongs to Techno-Freak now! a-haha-a!" Techno-Freak yells out, throwing one of his fists down in an attempt to smash SIM to the ground.
Instead SIM grabs Techno-Freak's fist and throws the massive figure over her shoulder, the armored-bully falling to the ground awkwardly as he lays on his back for a few moments - stunned into silence.
"..had enough?" SIM enquires, crossing her arms slightly as she watches Techno-Freak rise, the armored-figure rubbing his head slightly.
"No! NO! I won't be beaten! I WON'T! I AM THE MIGHTY TECHNO-FREAK!" he roars, charging at SIM in a rage - only for SIM to step to one side: as a result Techno-Freak crashes into a nearby tree and once again falls to the ground.
"..last chance.. I don't want to humiliate you in front of your little friends.." SIM says, looking to Techno-Freak as he once again gets to his feet: a little shaky now.
"You can't beat me! I'm level 5000! level 5000!!!!!!" Techno-Freak screams, stomping his feet in anger.
SIM simply shakes her head at this display and proceeds to grow to gigantic size, easily towering over Techno-Freak, who she proceeds to pick up by the scruff of the neck:
"..you do know the new level cap is level 5001?" she says.
"..what!? NO! NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Techno-Freak yells out, flailing wildly.
SIM proceeds to open a portal and tosses Techno-Freak inside, the portal closing behind him.
"you'll pay for this! I will have vengeance! you'll see! you haven't seen the last of me!"
SIM sighs a little as she shrinks back to her usual size, a smile spreading on her face as the crowds suddenly emerge from hiding and begin to cheer and clap "..glory to SIM - destroyer of grief! annihilator of annoyance! all hail to the new hero of Ownage!".
"..okay guys.. that's enough.." SIM smiles, only to be lifted up by the crowd and carried off towards the nearby village "..I said thats enough.. guys? guys!?" she squeaks, the crowds continuing to cheer as they continue on their way..
The scene shifts back to the apartment block as Francis tears off his V-Monitor and flails around madly, taking a childish tantrum as he yells out:
"no! no! no! this can not be! no! I won't accept it! I won't!"
Francis gets into a chair and proceeds to spin around to a nearby desk, scattering bits and pieces of equipment before he finds an old typing board - he proceeds to type wildly on the board.
"..I won't be beaten! I won't allow it! you'll see.. you haven't seen the last of Techno-Freak! a-haha-a!"
- THE END -